i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
nutella sex= disaster
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
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