cannot fit in my clothes. too depressed to drink.
if you drink enough to puke, it's like a weight loss plan.
drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
Randomize