I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
Randomize
