if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
I want you more than these girls want KFC
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
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