i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
25 People Admit the Worst Things They’ve Done for Good Reasons
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
25 Things All Men Can Definitely Agree On
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.