I want to make a zoo with you.
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
she woke me up with a blowjob, mickey mouse pancakes, a mugshot of my ex in county jail, and tequilla. Do you know if she fucked someone behind my back or did i win the vagina lottery?
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
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