Is it normal to miss your booty call?
"Ever since I killed her kid she be actin' shady." Actual quote overheard at Marine World just now. Oh God.
don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
I thought my broken hand would put a damper on Halloween, but fake costume eyelashes and hydrocodone are kinda fun at the same time.
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
Randomize
