You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
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