i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
Randomize
