I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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