Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
Randomize
