i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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