and you said cock pushups were impossible
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
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