so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
Dude, this old lady messaged me on Facebook talking about her grandson and wanted to know shit about me. I'd almost call her a cougar except she looks like mashed potatoes that have come alive.
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
Randomize
