i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
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