I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
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Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
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I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
I need mimosas to revive my soul
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