I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize