Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
Can't talk, ducks in the car
I think I just shit out all my problems.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
My boss couldn’t find her phone so she asked me to call it and when I found it the screen said Fuck Toy was calling. I’m very much okay with this
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