well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
These Dirty People Haven’t Told Their SO About Their Kinky Fetish
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
This is Why People Stop Sex Halfway Through
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class