I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
We just shotgunned beers for America
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
i need some magic done to my vagina
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
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