i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
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