So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
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