Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
Randomize
