In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
Randomize