I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
We are finally out of the honeymoon stage of the relationship because it turns out that you can't come back from peeing on me in your sleep.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
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