Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
this homeless guy just told me to make a wish on his magic plastic spoon but said to be careful what i wish for...
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
