So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
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