I just saw a hot homeless man
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
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