what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
If a cop asks you "Where do you go for fun?", it's not a pick up line...especially if he just pulled you over.
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
Do you remember some guy walking around the club saying "boner patrol" and smacking people in the dick?
Yeah, that was you
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Randomize
