He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
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