I think I can smell my own vagina right now
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize