Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
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