drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
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