I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
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