i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
Just want the two of you to know, I went to a golf tournament today. Respectable, expensive… Flipped the golf cart. Seriously, I'm 40. What the fuck?
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
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