There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
Princesses don't give blow jobs
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
THERE ARE LEGITLY 4 SEPARATE BITE MARKS ON MY DICK. WHAT. THE. FUCK.
Legitimately*
Go fuck yourself
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
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