is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize