Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
she called me screaming that i shouldn't ignore her phone calls, because she's not trying to get me to hang out with her and she doesn't want to be my girlfriend, she just wants sex.
what did you do?
i asked her out. that's so hot.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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