I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
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