wakey wakey hands off snakey
the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
Randomize
