Don't you send me to vm
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
decision: in honor of being in new orleans this weekend all my drunk texts will be en francais
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
Randomize
