A little boy walked by his parents room one night, looked through the keyhole, and said "and that bitch tells me to stop sucking my thumb!"
my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
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