If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
I looked into this "it's just lunch" matchmaker thing and it was like 5 grand. If I'm gonna spend five grand I'll throw in another three and get new tits and find my own fucking husband.
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
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