No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
Is that strawberry winking at me??
Randomize
