HIV tests are more positive than that guy
I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
You fell asleep mid BJ last night. I put your pants back on you. My ego is pretty bruised this morning.
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
Randomize
