ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
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