he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
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