I smell stomach acid.
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
Randomize