I blacked out in 45 minutes and woke up with a missed call from someone I saved in my phone as the karate kid.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize