He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
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