Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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